SXSW – Austin, Texas…I hugged a hot trannie!

Katey Red - NOLA showcase
Katey Red - NOLA showcase

Ugh, where to start. Wednesday, St Patty’s Day, ( I don’t have a lick of Irish in me, but they do make fabulous whiskey) was a night thing because I had to work all day. After work I went downtown and drank my face off by myself, well, not by myself – with the other 120,000 people there (and the verizon network). I was rollin solo and decided to fake an English accent in order to get free drinks. Guess what, it worked! I weaseled my way into someone’s audio interview and then decided to head home, work @ 7am on Thursday was quite painful.

Thursday – I got off work at 3:30 and hung out with my homegirls (i love you guys). They drink whiskey, we are the hot mess express. That night I saw The Gary, GLITTERBILLIES, The XX, The Great Nostalgic, and a Memphis Rap showcase – including Lord T and Eloise…who I fucking adore! I got some heart to heart in with my girl LA Cameron and that was precious. Ate dinner that night at a sandwich trailer. I love trailers.

Friday – Baby Robots played at the Leisure Tourniquet Equinox Mish Mash day show…my girl Henna scored me free pair of Keen shoes and I drank waaaaay too much beer. Mind you, it was only 2pm. Went home to welcome my parents. They came in because Friday night I sang with the legendary ST 37, who played with Houston’s Rusted Shut and Future Blondes, and Japan’s Acid Mothers Temple. I think all of my friends were there, it was insane. (Ella – where the hell were you?) I was positively hammered, but kept my shit together to get work done!

Saturday – I got a very very late start, 8:30pm. I drove to my friend’s record store, Trailer Space, and left car there and hoofed it downtown. It was cold as fuck, but a beautiful night none-the-less. Got downtown about 10, gave Wendy some warm clothes, and then headed to the “bounce” showcase at Submerged. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, “Bounce” is a new, to me, genre of music out of New Orleans that is African American transvestite rappers. (You know – like those ST 37 old fuckers that have been playing since ’87, but people are just figuring it out) And holy hell, Katey Red was HOT! Also saw Bowling for Soup – I am so not into them, but they did an improv audience karaoke deal at the end of their show that was super fun. And, they have fun and they are pros, so I respect their craft. Katie (not sure about this first name) Flay was rad. Solo act. And now…I’m tired. My honey couldn’t remember where he parked (this is not the first time, mind you) so we walked around the parking garage for far too long. However, I had some stickers on hand so I decided to decorate some cars. So, if you were rollin in a BMW station wagon this weekend…and you find a “Defend New Orleans” sticker on your car. Yes, that was me, and yes, you are welcome!

Oh wait – I forgot to mention that there were two people FUCKING on stage at the trannie show, they got kicked out…and I got a fabulous story. I did not see cuz I’m so god damned short, but…still. Food, eh…I was infatuated with the empanada trailer earlier in the week, but to be honest – after all the recreational indulgence I encountered over the past 6 days…not all that interested! SXSW, you have done me right yet again. I’m getting too old for this shit.

Who sucked: (bands not to waste your cheese on) – She and Him, he who is talented and she who needs to stick with her day job.  Broken Bells – er, boring combo.  Hey Dangermouse, you lucked out with Gnarls Barkley – don’t push your luck, pal.  The XX – heard it about five years ago, it’s called My Morning Jacket.  Surfer Blood – rich Florida parents = even if you suck you can still be famous…sigh.  Cymbals Eat Guitars – Hey Joe, you ripped off my friend Matt and he plays in my garage for free.

That being said, I still wasted my time watching all these assholes…and I plan to do it again next year!

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