There are many great places to eat in Austin and Guero’s Taco Bar is at the bottom of the list…read on for those that deserve the accolades!

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I know, I know! What a great picture this is! Walking up to Guero’s Taco Bar, you get the sensation that the atmosphere is totally kickin, the food smells delicious, and the music (can’t go anywhere in this town without music) sounds like home! My bf and I had his mom and his sister in town a couple of weeks ago from Ohio. They had never been to Texas before so we decided that we would give them a little taste of Austin immediately upon their arrival. We decided that we would take them to Guero’s. The atmosphere is usually killer…it’s so Austin. We both agreed that the food lacked any sort of “umph”, but we were in favor of showing off our city. NEVER AGAIN WILL I SACRIFICE GOOD FOOD FOR ATMOSPHERE…which sucked that night anyways.

To begin with, the waiter was some fucking washed up hipster who stayed up too late the night before pretending like his band was good. He was a fucking dick, plain and simple. We ordered some margaritas and they showed up in a glass not much bigger than a thimble. For $8 bux a pop, I was certain they were gonna rock my world…”maybe you only need one”…not so much. They were weak and had absolutely nothing special to them. Granted, I did not get the chocolate latte, top shelp, white tequila, with a cherry on top margarita…I am a Texas girl. I just like to have a sippy sip and get a buzz…that is what Tex-Mex means to me!

For starters we got the queso flameado. A white cheese combination with an added treat of chorizo thrown in. There was so much oil in the flameado that you could have drank it with a straw. It was disgusting.

My bf wanted some crispy tacos and when he ordered them (they don’t have them) the dick waiter copped a major attitude with him. Only a real Tex Mex place can provide one with sufficient cripsy tacos. And trust me, that is his thing…he knows where to find the best in town…(we’ll get into later…for him I will dedicate a post to crispy tacos)…

Anyways, I cannot remember what anyone else had, or what I had for that matter, all I know is that after I got the $80 bill for four simple meals and a couple of drinks, I was about to throw up all over the place. It was the worst meal of their stay, and unfortunately, it was their first food experience in Austin!

Some amazing places that we did visit was Mi Madres for breakfast…delicious and fresh and inexpensive with a great atmosphere…it is on the east side. Gentrified w/ pride. (I am actually for co-habitation, but this is the real world people, wake up)

We had some amazing brisket and all around real Texas BBQ at Ruby’s BBQ! We chose to load up on meat and then share an array of tasty sides including mac-n-cheese, cole slaw (one cream based and one vinegar based – both delicious), fresh bread, pickles, onions, and a slice of sweet potato pie for dessert. They said it was yum…I did not go there! I saved my calories for a delicious cold Lone Star and I suggest you do the same…

Our next BBQ experience was at The County Line on the lake. While it is definitely one of the pricier smoked meat joints, it is well worth it…Here we decided to go all out family style w/ ribs, brisket, sausage, and sides of beans, potato salad, and cole slaw…ALL YOU CAN EAT! Don’t forget to order a loaf of their fresh bread with honey butter…you will thank me after you wake up from your meat induced coma!

Also, be sure to visit the huge catfish and turtles in the water with your leftover bread!

Unfortunately, after they left, we treated ourselves to dinner at The Rio Grande, the former Real World Austin house…it was amazing. Anyone who puts on limit on their margaritas is alright by me. We started with a plain queso. It was creamy and perfect and served with thin warm tortilla chips and homemade corn and flour tortillas. I am not saying that they make them in house, but I am saying that they did not come from the grocery store. I am part latina, tortillas hold a special place in my heart. We split a divine salad with a balsamic vinagrette dressing, everything was fresh and delicious. For dinner we share the filet mignon fajitas! Oh.My.God – go there…got it?

There are so many delicious places to eat in this town, and while I am simply disgusted that I had to be the one to experience Guero’s – yet again – I decided to let you guys know how my experience went!

Bon Apetite, Bitches…

GBJ

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