Anthony Bourdain, Take Two…and some SHIT food!

Baaaad Tony!

It’s no joke, kids…amigo and I like to get our food on!  Last night, my sweet man escorted me to see my foodie idol, Anthony Bourdain.  Now, I have seen him once before, this time in much better company, and he was great then as well, however, I do believe that I now have a much better understanding of him and what his food and his travels mean to him.  He knows his shit!  He applauded Bobby Flay, saying that he feels sorry for him because he is the food channel clown.  Flay keeps the network running while they pimp him out around the country doing “Throw Down with Bobby Flay”.  He’s right.  He says that vegetarian foodies have no right to travel and host food shows…I think he was pointing at YOU, Gwyneth Paltrow.  He has always touted Rachael Ray as being obnoxious – she is, and he claims the worst thing he has ever eaten in a Chicken McNugget.  (Brief tidbit:  In my house, we call Chicken McNuggets chicken boots, or chicken wheels.  Ever notice how every other nugget is shaped the same?  In a boot or in a wheel!  It makes me laugh…)  I wonder what the lawyers of McDonald’s would do if they heard Tony say that?  I guess nothing much, it’s not like the people who eat that shit have enough intelligence to comprehend the Travel Channel anyways.  Ps, Did you know that there are 38 ingredients in a McDonald’s Chicken McNugget?  That’s just plain fuckin wrong!   

Inside a McDonald's nugget...NASTY!

Anyways, since being early to the show was priority for me, amigo and I decided to hit Hickory Street Bar and Grill for dinner.  MISTAKE!  This piece of shit is an Austin landmark…what the fuck for I can’t figure out, but it is.  I have been before for drinks on the patio, but that’s it.  The service was feeble, there was no salt on the table until my meal was nearly over, there were flies in the salad bar, and amigo’s cheesesteak that he ordered took FOREVER!  My drink was watered down, my lime was dry and barren and my baked potato was not cooked through and it was cold.  They pride themselves on this salad/soup/potato bar, so I went for it (I know, I know – budget world!).  Other than the fact that I was able to begin stuffing my pie hole immediately, there was not one shining moment for this disaster area.  Ground Zero.

The Paramount Theater, Austin

From Hickory Street, we went to the Paramount Theater to pick up our tickets and realized we still had an hour to spare before the show.  We decided to pop into Austin’s oldest and most beautiful hotel, The Driskill, for a drink at their very fine bar.  The keeper was Scottish and supremely professional, and he knew how to make an excellent drink.  Hendrick’s and tonic with a lime, thank you.  We received our drinks and decided we would take a self-guided tour around the hotel.  AMAZING.  Amigo and I have vowed to go back for dinner…SOON! 

The Lobby of The Driskill Hotel, Austin

Anyways, the moral of the story, folks?  Go see Anthony Bourdain any chance you get, it was well worth my $10, DO NOT eat at Hickory Street Bar and Grill in Austin, Texas, and don’t even think about eating a chicken nugget, not even with a stranger’s mouth!  Finally, marry your partner if they like sharing moments like these with you.  Eating and drinking and laughing is such a wonderful way to live life!

Leave a Reply