An open letter to Kelly Clarkson;

Dear Kelly Clarkson,

We know that you hate you record label and that the last thing you want on earth is to be a “star”.  Let me just go over some very important bullets with you, my love.  First off, and secondly, for that matter…Clive Davis owns your fat ugly white ass.  He has made you who you are today…If you think your music rocks and you could have done this on your own…we need to talk.  Also, it is obvious you don’t want to be “star”.  They, by definition of the standard, have to take care of themselves.  How can you possibly say that you don’t want to be a star when you went on a tv show called American Idol?

Please don’t think that you are sending your listeners some deep message that they can’t already get from PSB on Saturday mornings.

Hope you are well!

XOXO,

GBJ